Tuesday, March 22, 2011

On Withered Vine - (Rondel)

grapes can not thrive on withered vine
despite how hard we work and toil
they can’t withstand neglected soil
tied up with string or wire or twine

the yearn for growth we can’t confine
twisted branches need to uncoil
grapes can not thrive on withered vine
despite how hard we work and toil

no longer can we make our wine
from grapes so plump, so red and royal
now only wilt and rot and spoil
are gathered from this crop of mine
grapes can not thrive on withered vine

16 comments:

  1. You've managed to construct a traditional atmosphere to the thoughts within this traditional structure. I particularly like the unexpected rhyme "royal" near the end, refreshing after the reader is lulled by the rhyming scheme.

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  2. Grape vines are tricky sidewinders encroaching everywhere they can! Good rhymes!

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  3. divine words..
    thrive and live...

    Thanks for sharing...

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  4. This is very good Charile. Kudos!

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  5. I just came back from a wine tasting and read your rondel-perfect! I, too, am beginning to learn about the different structured poems and am enjoying trying them out. I enjoyed yours very much!

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  6. thank you for introducing me to a new genre of poetry - becca

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  7. liked the varying rhyme in your wonderfully versed poem, Charlie.. and a new form to try too... thank u..

    Here's My Poetry For The Rally

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  8. wow! this to me is sophis.. thanks for coming by charlie..

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  9. the vine, so true. i have tried and tried my grape vines whither and die.

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  10. Cheers, this is lovely. Well played.

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  11. wow! great thoughts and words :)

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  12. Why, Its not just about grapes! I viewed it as an allegory instead about growth in our everyday lives! Nice nice..

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  13. Takes lots of pruning to keep the vines healthy and producing. Same with people. Sometimes a little pruning is necessary to get quality growth.

    Enjoyed your poem.

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  14. love the usage of words....excellent!!!!

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  15. I enjoyed this poem very much, it was well thought out and crafted. Great job.

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