The Crazy Cat Lady (Here Kitty, Kitty, Kitty)

The fire department was called to the parking lot
out behind Wal-Mart today
to rescue a middle-aged, white, woman
who became stuck in a storm drain.
She was stuck for several hours
and said she climbed in to rescue a kitten.
With the help of the firefighters, she did rescue the kitten.
It was on the local news, she was a hero
and Wal-Mart donated a years supply of cat food.
I didn’t say anything,
but I saw her climb into the storm drain
right after she called 911
with the kitten already in her arms.

The Crazy Cat Lady

leaving the house for only short periods at a time
just long enough to buy cat food and kitty litter
stopping at the used clothes donation bin
and if nobody is looking
stealing a bag or two of the donated clothes
(not that stealing is right, but nobody
wants to donate clothes to dress up stray cats)
today is “Corky’s” birthday
she’ll be the one dressed as a princess
and if you plan on buying her something
remember she only likes the low-sodium Deviled Ham
she also needs a new tooth brush, (medium soft bristle)
“Buttons “ (Corky’s ex) will be there
he says he’s not dressing up, but my guess is
he’ll wear that new blue sweater
he’s still not over her